Cupid sucks and so does the 2 week wait before the Super Bowl!!

Mondays bite. At least the weather this weekend was keen. It was like 40 degrees out. Total t-Shirt weather up in these here parts. Only six more days until the Big Game. I'm stoked. I want this week to end so damn quick I cant take it. Jess got her tax return today which is odd since we both filed the same way, the same day, in fact I filed an hour before her by phone. No biggie as long as they don't fuck something up. It would be a pleasant surprise to have that extra cash so soon. Speaking of cash Valentines day is coming. What a pain in the ass. Not good timing for me at all. I have no idea what I'm going to get her. I know she wants a ring. I hate buying jewelry. The reason I hate it so much is that I'm not going to buy her some shitty $100 piece of crap. If I'm buying her a ring its going to be a nice one. Who the hell has that kind of cash to blow?? Especially now. Taxes were going to bills and stuff like getting my blind ass eyeballs straightened out. We will have to see. I don't even want to think about it know. Shit man, its Super Bowl Week. Oh and I started smoking again with a vengeance.

yipee.

Short Week

I banged out sick yesterday. I'm such a moron sometimes. It took me a month to get a full paycheck form my new job since I started right in the middle of the holidays and like a jackass I miss 2 days in 3 weeks. I was exhausted though. Monday through Wednesday totally trashed me. So much shit to do so little time. "Manager". I think I need a way to manage my time so I can complete every task that comes across my desk.Its Madness I say. The day off was good though. I am all fresh today and am catching up quite quickly. Yesterday I laid around and took a few painkillers to make the day a tad bit more enjoyable. Then Jess and I went to see "White Noise" with Michael Keaton. I decide that each time I watch a new movie I will write a review here. See below. Not much else to talk about. Should have my measly tax return soon. Its not much due to the fact that A:I have no Children
B:I claim myself during the year so my weekly checks are bigger.
C:I made more than $11,500 dollars which I guess is the poverty level these days. If I had made under that I would have had an extra $350. If I had 3 kids and made under that I would have cleared an extra $4500. I shit you not. This is called the "earned income credit". I call it "cash for trailer trash."

My review for "White Noise"

Starring Michael Keaton
Directed by Geoffrey Sax
In Theatres Now

Michael Keaton is a great actor. I always liked him. From Night Shift to Batman to Clean and Sober he could come across as an everyday kinda guy in a not so everyday situations. We forgive him for Multiplicity and Jack Frost. Hey everyone's gotta make a buck.
Here we have Keaton playing a widowed husband who can hear the voices of the dead through static and other white noises called EVP's. These voices include his recently( you see it coming MILES away if not for the Trailer) deceased writer wife. Keaton starts at TV screens, hangs out with Deborah Unger who if you ever saw Cronenberg's "Crash" you cant help but picture her getting kinky with James Spader. Sorry, I'm getting off subject much like this "Sixth Sense" rip-off that starts out flat, tries to right itself somewhere in the middle then completely implodes at the end. Keaton seems lost at times like he really has no idea where the plot is going. Scares amount to as much as a loud 18 Wheeler suddenly crossing an intersection from offscreen.Wow creepy. Not. The three part ending will have you first scratching your head at the "big twist" and Keatons outcome, then the scene with Keatons son in the car, OH MY GAWWD, when you see you will know. And for the very last shot you will again be scratching your head unless you are trying to calm down after laughing so hard from the scene in the car with the boy. You just have to see for yourself but not until it comes on video and still not until its an old release you can pick up for a buck a night. Then maybe it will be more fun then staring at a fuzzy TV screen. But not by much. There is a slate of Horror movies coming out and god knows I LOVE horror movies its not looking to good.

My Rating for "White Noise" *1/2 One and a half asterisk's out of 5 asterisk's.

I would like to recommend the Top 5 Horror movies I saw in 2004. This doesn't mean they came out in 2004 but it means I saw them in 2004.

#1 Ju-On-The Grudge-The Japanese original NOT the Buffy remake.
#2 Shaun of the Dead-Horror comedy at its finest from those silly Brits.
#3 Dawn of the Dead-The remake. Not as meaningful as the original but still fun.
#4 Texas Chainsaw Massacre-The Remake. This film has no ounce of morality. Pure Mayhem! Yum!
#5 Bubba Ho-Tep-Ok not really horror but a wonderful slice of Indy goofy horror comedy.

Peace out beeyotches!

Snow and more Snow

There's nothing but snow outside. The wind is whipping around, my fingers are frozen. My junk truck sputters to life as I crank the heater and run back inside for the last ten minutes of my work shift. I hate the cold. I sit here typing this, giving my truck enough time to warm up so I can make the 45 minute trek home across the snow covered roads. It began snowing at like 5am. Its 5 pm and the snow continues. This is my life.

I cannot contain my joy. I see a Valium and some boxed wine in my near future. Good Day.

Vote for Pedro

hehe. If you laughed when you read this title I congratulate you. If not run out now and buy "Napoleon Dynamite" on DVD. Its SWEET. Gives me hope that there are young filmmakers out there trying to break the molds of such crap like Van Helsing, Soul Plane and anything starring a big titted pop singer or anorexic former child star. Its a funny flick, odd, silly but warm hearted at its core. Check it out.

Speaking of sweet shit The New England Patriots crushed the Steelers last Sunday and have advance to the Super Bowl for the third time in the last 4 years. We are really getting spoiled up here in New England.

Damn its been a busy two days so far. I'm swamped with shit to do here. This will have to be short. Lets see, what the hell was I gonna write about today. I cant remember. I may have to start smoking again. I know it sounds ridiculous but I am doing great on my diet except I am not losing any weight. Its because before when I lost all the weight I quit smoking and went an a diet AND I was working twelve hours a day running around Managing a retail store. Now I sit at a desk for eight hours and do not move. Its a recipe for disaster. If I start again I will quit in the spring after I have lost the weight and can get outside to get some exercise. I've also been having horrible mood swings. I know it sounds like a dumb idea but sometimes you have to take things one step at a time. Not to mention IM DYING FOR A FUCKIN BUTTTT!!!!!!

sorry.
bye.

The Chinese are Coming

I love Friday's. I really look forward to the 48hrs of freedom from the workplace every weekend. I get giddy like our President does when his wife gives him a bubble bath. This great war on terror actually affected me and my employers today. Some of you may have heard about this "terror threat" in Boston involving these Chinese dissidents. Its been all over the news. Anyway today I get a call from customs in Boston. Seems a shipment of our product from China has been seized. Why? Because its from China and there may be Chinese terrorists hiding amongst the boxes I guess. Guess our customers will have to wait another 2 weeks.

Big game Sunday. Can't wait. We will win. My Prediction-Pats 27 Steelers-17. My goal this weekend is to catch up on 24 so I can start watching the new season. Also its budget time. Yes Jess and I will finally start actually putting most of our money away in this neat thing called a "Bank". That way when the bills come you don't have to waste a whole weeks pay because you will already have planned ahead and be able to cover them! What a neato idea.

Oh yeah, if you want to find funny as hell and extremely offensive T-Shirts head on over to my good friends at http://www.tshirthell.com/hell.shtml I was looking for some funny anti-Bush shirts and stumbled upon them. Too funny.

I bought 2 new pairs of Diesel Jeans off eBay but the jackass cant accept payment through paypal right now. I got a damn good deal on these so I hope he straightens it out. These are $150 Jeans were talkin about and I got a great deal on em. My ass will be worth more that my truck with those things on.

That's all for this week, be safe and keep an eye out for those Chinese!

Thirsty Thursdays

I have to be carefull not to turn this into a political forum but yesterday I was just in one of those moods I guess. I'm sure anyone that doesn't know me would think I'm some whiny liberal but I'm not and I'm not gonna waste any time explaining it today. Eat all the Tuna you want, Dolphins don't taste good anyway.

Onto more pressing matters such as the upcoming AFC Championship game between my beloved New England Patriots and the greasy ass Piss-burgh Steelers. I swore last week after defacing myself so badly that this week I would NOT over indulge during the game. Well I'm still going to attempt refrain but the excitement is building and I am sure getting thirsty. Again I am mourning the fact that kickoff is at 6:30 pm on Sunday night. End of Game? Around 10pm. Finally home in bed? Who the hell knows...that will depend greatly on the outcome.

Ok onto some random thoughts for this lovely Thursday;

Lindsey Lohan is still my new favorite Teen Pig. http://www.lindsay-lohan-sexy-pictures.com/ll32.jpg

Resident Evil 4 is a truly freaky and incredible game.Who says Gamecube is for kids? http://www.gamespot.com/gamecube/adventure/residentevil4/screens.html?page=240

TV still for the most part suck's ass so I have jumped on the bandwagon of buying old shows on DVD and watching them without commercials. Our lineup currently includes:X-Files,The Sapranos,The West Wing,The Office,Ren and Stimpy,24,Da Ali G Show, Cheppelles show,Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Seinfeld and ER.

I am truly worried about the Yankees pitching staff next year. It is scary good.

I like my new job I just hate the ride every morning.

I hate dieting and I want to smoke again. ARGGGGGG.

I wrote a short horror story last week. It was the first time I wrote any fiction in a looong time. I actually liked it and may continue this trend.

I miss the Florida sun. http://www.florida-photos.com/sunset_4.html

Ok, I'm done.

I want to Pee on Condy Rice

I really do. She has a face like a toilet. Have you seen her on the Hill this week during her confirmation hearings? Though most of the Senators have been kissing her ass, when pseudo Dyke Barbara Boxer grilled her, ole Condy wouldn't even say "Yeah we fucked up a little in Iraq, sorry" Oh no, she sat there poopy faced and never once used the word "mistake". Shit, even Bubba Clinton eventually admitted his mistakes, he rubbed one out all over Monica and said "Sorry!". Now he commands $20,000 to speak to a roomfull of hippies and Bubba groupies.

What is up with this Bush Whitehouse? Georgy Porgy could fart at a statehouse dinner and he'd blame it on the dog, or at least on Laura. No they have nothing to be sorry about. JR's got political capitol thanks to the bible thumpers who paraded to the polls chanting "Kerry is Satan, Bush is Pro Life!!!No more BJ's in the White House!" Shit if Hitler was Pro-Life they would vote for him too.

It hurts to say that I am currently ashamed to be an American in this day and age. That is tough to say after all the sacrifices good American Men and Women have made for us and thanks to them we have the free society that we are currently trying to jam down Islams throat. Of course we have the religious Right in America trying to force feed us the Gospel according to Bush. Then there is his biggest supporter's, the zealots who want to control what we read,write,watch and listen too and of course who,when and how we fuck.

So yeah, I want to piss all over Condaleeza Rice then take a huge steaming shit on the rug in the Lincoln Bedroom. Then maybe ole' George can claim to have finally found one of his "WMD'S".

Or he can just blame it on the dog.

"You have a mishaped head."

Isn't that what the kid told Adam Sandler in Billy Madison. Well that's how my head feels today. Bloated and burnt. Its a strange hangover. I was so drunk after the Patriots drubbing of the Colts to advance in the NFL playoffs I actually binged and purged last night. I stumbled around the house stuffing my face with any food in sight just to soak up all the booze sloshing around in my belly after some drunken marathon sex and a 3 hour football game. I had been drinking wine since 1pm yesterday then had about 4 shots of Jagrmeister during the game. Then I went home, knocked boots, gorged myself then promptly forced myself to throw it back up. Yuck huh. Now I know how Mary Kate Olsen feels. Or was it Ashley? Anyway it helped a little with the exception of the broken blood vessels in my eyelids and the strange streched feeling my face took on today. God, I am getting to old for this shit. Even worse the AFC Title game is next Sunday night at friggin 6:30pm.Another late work night. I know ill tell myself "Ill take it easy" but this is Patriots Football and I go nuts during the games. Yes, my Neanderthal traits shine bright as I pound my chest and scarf Nachos and drink beers (okay wine ) calling the opposing Quarterback "a Fag!". That's how we do it here in Po-Dunk NH. Some of us even drag our wives around by their hair still.

I kid, I kid. Sometimes you still need that manly pastime to give you the excuse to act silly and bore your girlfriends to death. God Bless em for putting up with us. So its been a long Monday not to mention its freezing in my damn office here at work. I heard a rumor we are out of heating oil. Ridiculous. I could easily be wearing mittens and a scarf right now and not be hot.

I started reading my cousins Appalachian Adventure again from the beginning on his website today to pass the time in between placing orders and listening to customers tell me how bad my company sucks. I plan on doing a lot more hiking next year. I wish I could take 6 months off and do that. Shit, maybe ill hike a week a year. Lets see, 2000+ miles, maybe I could finish 60 miles a week, um that's about 33 weeks. Cool! Id finish the trail at age 63. Groovy.

Jon Stewart kicks Tucker in the Nuts!

HAHA! I included Jon Stewart in my New Years list and am happy to say his on air feud with Tucker Carlson, the right wing, bow tie wearing dork from Crossfire has lost his job at CNN and Crossfire has been canceled. For those who are not in the know:
Jon Stewart's favorite TV talking head, Tucker Carlson, is on the outs at CNN.
The bowtie-sporting conservative pundit, whom Stewart called a "dick" and accused of spreading "partisan hackery" and "hurting America" during their now infamous exchange on Crossfire, is exiting the Cable News Network after executives opted not to offer him a new contract.
CNN has also pulled the plug on Crossfire.

CNN President Jonathan Klein even said "I guess I come down more firmly in the Jon Stewart camp," said Klein, referring to the Daily Show host's knock that Crossfire and its ilk don't fully inform viewers and are ultimately divisive

Tee Hee I love it! Of course "Fucker" Carlson will get a job elsewhere, it still shows that a funny guy that does fake news on Comedy Central can call a guy a "dick" on National TV and come out a winner!! Way to go Jon!

The New Year List

1 What did you do in 2004 that you'd never done before?
Hiked part of the Appalachain trail, ran my cousins website for 6 months, started this silly blog and learned alot about computers and shit. Also did not break up, split up or seriously fight with my girlfriend. Not one of my most exciting years. Where were these questions a few years ago when I was traveling the country amidst an orgy of women, booze and pizza???

2.Did you keep your new years resolutions , and will you make more for next year?
Yes and Yes. So far ive quit smoking and stayed on my diet. Next year will probably be the same thing.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
My Aunt did.


4. Did anyone close to you die?
Not close but Dimebag Darrells murder sucked.


5. What countries did you visit?
None.


6.What would you like to have happen more in 05 than did in 04?
Well im already making more money and id like to have more free time (never happen) and would like to have our ROOMS FINFISHED!!!!!!!

7. What dates from 2004 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? October 20th, Red Sox defeat The Yankees in a record breaking comeback to reach the World Series and of course October 27th, Red Sox Win the World Series for the first time in 86 years. I still cant believe it. I was also very happy and proud the day my Cousin Rick finished his Appalachain Thru-Hike.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Probably getting this new job, not driving Jess insane and not dying of a heart attack when the Red Sox won it all.

9. What was your biggest failure? Still relying too much on Med's to keep me sane and gaining back almost all the weight i so painstakingly lost 2 summers ago.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Does a thinning hairline and a half-assed narcotic addiction count?

11. What was the best thing you bought? Theres alot but I think its a toss up between the X-Box and The TIVO. My favorite gift would have to be my B-Day gift from cuzn Rick, the kick ass Tent of the future!

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? My Girfriend Jess and Cuzn Rick again. Jess for putting up with me and still being a sweetheart and the other for accomplishing a feat most of us could only dream of.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed and/or disgusted? Depressed?The Moral Right of America who were smiling and clutching their Bibles all the way to the polls.
Apalled? The FCC for going overbored about the Janet Jackson boob shit and trying to dictate what we can and cant see because of it.
Disgusted?The piece of crap who shot guitarist Darrell "Dimebag" Abbott onstage for nothing.

14. Where did most of your money go?Bills and DVD's bitch!

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? THE RED SOX!!!! And The Patriots too.

16. What song will always remind you of 2004? Probably "American Idiot" by Green Day and Gary Jules "Mad World" from the Donnie Darko Soundtrack.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Happier
b) thinner or fatter? fatter
c) richer or poorer? Richer

18. What do you wish you'd done more of? Working on my Goals.Sleeping. Spending more quality time with Jess.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of? Eating, medicating, arguing and working.

20. How will you be spending New Year's Eve? I spent New Years at a phat party at Shawns jamspace in Laconia. Good times had by all with the exception of a little rough ending but nothing's perfect.

21. Did you fall in love in 2004? Im already in love. Her name is Jess :-)

22. How many one-night stands? Zip. She's always there in the morning.

23. What was your favorite TV program? 24 by far!! Plus The Daily Show and MAD TV are great.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
Hate is bad. It can rot you away from the inside. I dont hate anyone. In fact I dont even dislike anyone I know personally. In general Im not a big fan of most conservatives but Im also not a big fan of whiny tree huggers either.

25. What was the best book you read?
The Rising by Brian Keene. Also American Psycho by Brett Easton Ellis and Island by Richard Laymon.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery? Its scary to think that I cant think of ONE new band in the last year that i would consider great. Ive got alot of great new CD's but there all from bands that are more than a year old. Maybe Gary Jule and the Donnie Darko soundtrack as far as something New to me. As far as Album of the Year its a tie between Chevelle-"This type of thinking could do us in" and Eminem-"Encore". Comeback of the year goes to Green Day-"American Idiot."

27. What did you want and get? An X-Box, a new job and TIVO!

28. What did you want and not get? A good Mini DV Camera. I did have one but it was cheap and I was paying too much so I returned it.

29. What was your favorite film of this year? Lord of The Rings: The Return of The King and Shaun of the Dead. Best all out Comedy was Anchorman!!!

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I was friggin 30 and I really dont remember.

31.What one thing would have made your year measurably more satisfying? Getting out of AMSAT and getting this job earlier. Completing a film shot on DV and winning the lottery. Bringing all our troops home from Iraq and if our Pool had made it in by the 4th of July.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2004? Not as good as years past. No more Filenes basement. Jeans, Hooded Sweathshirts rule, less t-shirts, more long sleeves. Shoes more than sneakers and believe or not a little less Hat!

33. What kept you sane? Jess and not Jess. She kept me sane and sometimes drove ,e insane. Time alone, video games and a good book.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? John Stewart and Dave Chapelle.

35. What political issue stirred you the most? Hands Down, Iraq.


36. Who or What did you miss? Free Thinkers, Cigarettes and my Dad(F.L) and my Brother.(N.J)


37. Who was the best new person you met this year? Jess's brother, a few good pals from AMSAT like Kevin, Jess, Megan and Jaime. I miss them too.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2004. Job security is a joke, The Moral right is very powerfull in this country and never count on your Pool being installed on time.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. "Show me how it ends, it's alright. Show me how defenseless you really are. Satisfy the emptiness inside. That's alright, let's give this another try" breaking benjamin -so cold

We all know how it ends, so who cares. Take care of someone who appreciates it, do whatever it takes to fill your voids as long as no one else suffers and keep on trying till you get it right.

40. What can you predict for 2005? Another list like this.

Blah Blah

It was a long, crazy weekend and to tell you the truth I just don't want to get into it. My cousin has problems with writing about stuff even a day after it happens and writing is what he does for a living. See jigglebox.com . Lets just say Jess and I fought a lot, my new TIVO was defective. Then I was ill on Monday morning and missed work. Turns out so did the CS Rep who works with me. So as you can imagine today has been very busy and I just don't feel like rehashing my shitty weekend. Jess and I are fine now, I have a new, working TIVO and life is back on track. Whatever track that is anyway.

Ringing in the Weekend

Its Friday and the phone in my office will not stop ringing. Jeez don't these people realize I'm trying to waste the day away and get out as quick as I can so I can get home and start my weekend! I guess these folks do want to know where their product's are and since its my job to make all these folks happy I guess I better do it. What some people have to do to survive.

I really wanted a cigarette yesterday but I didn't break. I have one final episode of 24 season 2 to watch tonight then I can go out and get Season Three, watch 24 episodes in 48 hours just in time to watch the premiere of season 4 on Sunday night. What a great show. I'm also trying to finish Knights of the Old Republic on X-Box so I can start part 2 which Jessica so kindly got me for X-mas. I may be 30 but I still love a damn good video game. Takes me far away from these ringing phones. There's no Patriots game this weekend so don't have to worry about that. I'm thinking about picking up Sirius radio to bring in my truck and to work with me. Haven't decided yet since my truck is a piece of shat and I should be smart and fix that as a first priority but we shall see. I have exactly 6 hours to go and the phones begin to ring again..

False Start

I needed to get something up here to start this thing. I always create these grand ideas in my head yet rarely go through with them. I've always wanted to have a cool website and even managed to post one once but it never amounted to much. I even paid homestead.com 20 bucks a month to host a page that had a photo of a friends cleavage and a "coming soon" banner. What a waste. So know I'm gonna give "blogging" a shot. I guess I just come here whenever and dump whatever info I feel like sharing. Not that many will see this but I truly believe the best therapist one can have is yourself. Yeah, that's it! This could be a form of therapy. A way to vent and speak my mind without boring or alienating anyone who was unlucky enough to sit next to me at some party. I need it now the most of course. Here we are in the New Year, full of resolutions and great ideas. Mine? Well once again I have vowed to quit smoking, lose the 15 pounds I gained since last time I dropped weight and find more ways to spend my ever dwindling spare time with my wonderful girl Jessica. So here I am and here I will be until I lose interest and head off into some other direction in a never ending search to feed the creative side of me. Of course that side has a really short attention span and a huge appetite. Unless it involves booze or a large group of like minded people I quickly lose interest, unless of course its a good movie or...wait. Ill save all this for further posts. Hopefully there will be more. Wish me luck.