Quickie

Rough day, major PC issues.

Click on below link to view an ebay auction that will make you smile

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=6171209997


peace out

So what is a Republicrat?

Well its not a very original play on words but it seems to sum up my political leanings. Anyone that has been reading this Blog may be confused at where I stand on certain issues. Yes I voted for Kerry but not because I am a Democrat. I don't dislike Georgie Porgie because he is a Republican and loves God, I hate him because he is an idiot and is a hand puppet for the right. I'm sure he means well but so didn't Bubba Clinton. He just liked getting a knob job while he was doing it. You see strict Democrats and Republicans fall into a few easily discernible categories.

Partisanship:
Democrats hate Republicans.

Republicans think Democrats are communist pig fuckers.

Defense and Law:
Democrats are pussies.

Republicans like to kill murderers and rapists and blow up countries who fuck with us.

Taxes:
Democrats like to create cajillions of useless programs to help the poor then tax the hell out of the poor to pay for it.

Republicans say "Fuck the poor, get a job"

Morals:
Republicans believe that the Lord God is the Higher power and base a lot of their agendas on religion.

Democrats believe that Ted Kennedy is the Higher Power and base a lot of their agendas on him.


It goes on and on....

First I think the two party system sucks. We really need more parties to diversify the issues. Second I agree with a lot of things on both sides. Lets take a brief look:

Death Penalty: Yes I strongly agree with it though it needs some tinkering and must only be used when we are damn sure the convicted is guilty.
Leaning-Republican

Abortion: I do not believe in abortion, I do not support abortion BUT I believe in a women's right to choose. I will not willingly donate money, I will not protest for it but I will never take away choice.
Leaning-So far Democrat I am falling over.

Defense: I am 100% for taking out anyone who poses threats or attacks to our country, our allies or our citizens abroad. I do not whine about civilian casualties, I do not whine about certain weapons or the way terrorists are treated in our custody. If cutting of their hands will prevent another terrorist attack on our soil then so be it. I am all for spending money on defense and having the most powerful army in the world. Leaning: Republican

..on the other hand I am against the Patriot Act, I am against the war in Iraq. I am against expending human life and money on non-threats. Afghanistan was warranted though it really didn't do much except kill some Taliban and scatter Al Queda. We cannot catch Bin Laden so Bush decides to go after the biggest pussy in the Middle East, Saddam Hussein. No WMD, more deaths from FOREIGN insurgents than the entire Iraqi army caused. Silly shit really. Leaning:Communist pig fuckers.

Separation of Church and State: Religion is a right every American has and will always have. Faith is a wonderful thing and I applaud all who follow those paths. Jesus, Buddha, Allah, Bono..whoever. Just don't push your beliefs on me or my kids. Don't look down on me because I don't go to church and don't knock on my door at 2pm on Sunday. You do your thing we will do ours. Now, for the jack ass who wanted "In God we Trust" taken off the dollar bill can go stick his dick in a light socket. Its obvious his only agenda is to make a silly idea public and since he garnered NO support whatsoever even people who work to keep Religion separate were embarrassed by this dildo. Sure we could change it to "In America we trust", in fact Id even vote for that but either way it doesn't bother me. Until they start leading public classrooms in prayer again you wont hear any complaints from me. Oh and by the way, if you don't want your kids to stand up during the National Anthem then you and your little ones can pack up, head over to China and get run over by tanks you stupid anti American, piss on our veterans, vile scum ass, corpse fuckers.
Leanings:Democrats,Republicans, Satanists, Necrophiliacs.

War on Drugs: One of the biggest wastes of time, money and good drugs. First, Pot is such a dumb ass drug I cant even believe its illegal. It doesn't make you violent, its not that bad for you(smoking cigs, drinking alcohol and watching American Idol are worst for your health) and there is no such thing as a "gateway drug". There are "gateways" like bad parents, shitty school systems and poverty but we wont get into that here. Also don't even get me on peer pressure....So putting dumb 19 year old's in jail for 5 years for having a pound of pot just doesn't seem to be working to well. My biggest beef ever is the fact that a lot of violent crimes hold softer penalties than drug offenses, even pot offenses. Its so stupid. I don't have a solution but unless you commit a robbery, run over someone or commit a violent crime (unless its against another criminal*) there shouldn't be any jail time involved. Use common sense. People who sell drugs, sell them to people who fuckin WANT drugs. There are no Hispanic guys hanging out at the playground trying to sell crack to 12 yr olds. That's another Myth of the drug war. Ever see "Reefer Madness?" Check it out someday. Just be sure to get good and ripped before you do.
Leanings:Democrats, High Times Subscribers,Frito Lay Inc.

*I am a proud supporter of Criminal on Criminal crime. As long as no innocents are hurt I believe there should be no penalty for violent felons killing their fellow violent felons. We should even give out prizes, kinda like those Subway stamps you can collect for a free sandwich.


I could go on but I will take pity on my faithful readers. Now you can see how torn I am. Never agreeing with either side, not sure who to vote for, not even sure if I should vote at all. Hopefully some day other parties will grow to where they can launch actual campaigns that stand a chance. Until then we are stuck with pussy, tax and spend, pro-choice Democrats and kill em all, bible thumping, have you heard the word of god lately?, Republicans. God help us all. Oh shit did I just pray??


Ciao

Warning:This Post contains foul language and scat humor involving Republicans. If you laugh at this post you are a communist devil worshipper...

After reading the below linked Blog, well after the tears from the laughter stopped anyway, I felt so puny in this blog universe. This is simply the funniest thing I have ever read and I silently wished i had wrote it. Also for the weak and proper it contains some VERY graphic language. I think it fits perfectly here at the Beef. Oh, and for the people who do not know who Anne Coulter is, first I envy you and second she is a conservative political author and commentator who uses insult humor to get her tight assed points across. At times in the past I have agreed with her like after 9/11 she said:

"We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity. We weren't punctilious about locating and punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German cities; we killed civilians. That's war. And this is war." Well everything except the convert to Christianity thing.

Then she goes and says something idiotic like:
"Liberals hate America, they hate flag-wavers, they hate abortion opponents, they hate all religions except Islam, post 9/11. Even Islamic terrorists don't hate America like liberals do. They don't have the energy. If they had that much energy, they'd have indoor plumbing by now."

She is a bible thumper, a liberal hater and an all around douchebag. I would pay to see her and Michael Moore fight it out to the death. If Anne wins she can have every American that owns Fahrenheit 9/11 deported. If Moore wins he gets to eat Coulters corpse and shit out her digested remains onto Bill Oreilly's chest, Cleveland steamer style baby! Live on Fox News of course.


Enjoy here http://ifuckedanncoulterintheasshard.blogspot.com/

The Blahs

Yup, this weekend was a blah. A bust, caca poopoo if you will. Me and the misses havent been talking much lately so its been kinda grim around the homestead. The Red sox lost Saturday night, I drank three bottles of wine and managed to get home around 5 am on Sunday morning. That pretty much took out my whole day. I had a few things planned but all I managed to do was vacuum the bedroom and watch Escape from New York on TV. Yippee. I even slept through Sundays Red Sox game and missed a couple of bench clearing brawls and they kicked their ass to boot. So ho hum, here we are, Monday morning again. The Bosses are away this week so even though they are cool and dont get on my back its a little less pressure around the office. Hope all is well out there in Beefland. Welcome to another week on the rock.

Slacker

Yeah I know, I have been slacking here at the beef lately. Its been over a week since the last post. I truly apologize to my 2 or 3 faithful readers. It has been a quick 7 days or so. The weather continues to get better here and this greatly improves my mood. Had a great time at Fenway Park in Boston last Friday night with Jess. Besides the fact that the 65 degree day quickly turned into a 43 degree evening all went well. It was so cold I had to track down a blanket for Jess. It was funny, I saw all these people carrying these fleece Red Sox blankets but for the life of me couldn't find any for sale. I finally found a booth where if you applied for a Red Sox MasterCard you get a free blanket. Free! Cant beat that. I wonder if Tyler S. Durden of Wuevos Grande, AZ will be approved for his Credit Card. Either way I got a free blanket and Jess got warm.

So we have a new Pope. He is 78 years old. See you all next year for the next Pope Vote.

That bankruptcy law I brought up a while ago here is ready to get approved. I truly think its going to screw a lot of poor people who have large medical bills. But hey, at least Chase Manhattan, Visa and Walmart will get their money now. After all, they have to make a living too ya know.

So pretty soon you will need a Passport to come back into the USA. So if you go up to Canada or down to Mexico you will need to have a Passport to get back in. There are some border towns, north and south that are none too happy about this. I did hear Georgy Porgie just found out about this and plans on making some changes. It scares me that our President just found out about something that has been in the news for weeks. Someone must have forgot to read him his morning paper.

In California the Governator finally said something that I agree with, He wants to close down our borders and basically stop all these illegals from pouring into our nation. We are already busting at the seams and have way too many internal issues to deal with let alone chasing these people around the desert. I have always held the belief that US citizens should come first before anyone else. This may shock many who know me but I actually sided with Pat Buchanan when he said we should build a wall around the country. I have seen immigration first hand in Boston, in California and Florida. I have met many hard working, legal immigrants that had to wait years for citizenship and I have also known a few fine folks who were denied a Green Card and sent home. Lets close the borders, sort through this mess, deport all the criminals and welfare cases, get the working folk a green card and install some kind of screening and probationary process for new immigrants. I don't just mean Mexicans. I mean ALL immigrants. Why should it be so easy to become a US citizen when it is very hard to move to most other countries. It is a priveledge to live and work in the United States . Just because we have become a bloated, bullying, lazy and jaded country lets not forget the millions who fought and died to make us bloated and lazy. I just don't think that was their original plan.

So they had an election in Iraq. Some guy won. Besides all that nothing has changed. Georgy still has not given any time table for a pull out. Every day we train new Iraqi security forces. Everyday they are killed by insurgents. We have control of one of the largest oil reserves in the world and Gas is 2.25 a gallon. So what exactly are we accomplishing here?

Over 2 years in Iraq

1,562 Dead American Soldiers

12,000 Wounded

20,000 Dead Iraqi Civilians


"Change the channel"- Brig. Gen. Mark Kimmitt's advice to Iraqis who see TV images of innocent civilians killed by coalition troops



On a lighter note, here's a story Fox News deemed important to run on their website.

"A strip club in Washington was raided yesterday. 16 strippers were arrested.
All 16 were accused of violating the local adult cabaret ordinance, some by getting too close to customers and others, by touching themselves in a sexual manner. No accusations were made of prostitution or other sex acts."


Welcome to Amerika folks. This is the country we live in now. These are the people who got George Bush re-elected. These are the people who write "local cabaret ordinances" and waste tax payer money by raiding strip clubs because the dancers GOT TOO CLOSE. These are the people that will get Supreme Court Judges appointed, these are the same people who wrote the Patriot Act. These are the people who will continue to get their way until we all wake the fuck up. We didn't do it last November that's for sure. Call me paranoid, call me a weak kneed liberal, call me an elitist. Just don't call me a Democrat. That would be more insulting than calling me a Republican. I'm a Republicrat. The bastard child of two out of wack parties leaning so far to one side, refusing to budge an inch in either direction.
Look at the fine print folks, read between the lines. Time is running out.

Have nice day! :-)

I'm Retired

I cant do it anymore. My 30 year old body cannot handle it. As of today Beer and Red Meat are no longer a part of my life. Both had been cut out considerably over the last 2 years but the excess of both over the years has taken its toll. This past weekend A friend and I drove 5 hours up into the woods of Maine to help a buddy move. We drank lots of beer, ate big fat juicy ham burgers and I smoked 17 packs of cigarettes. The destruction that my poor body took proved too much and sent me into a indigestion filled coma for 24 hours. 10 years ago I could have shook that abuse off like nothing. Not today. Not anymore. After a major bender it now takes my body 48 hours to recover. So for example if I get wrecked on Saturday Night, I will not be able to function until about noontime on Monday. This is not good when you have to be at work for 8am. So I have retired. Beer will only be allowed on special occasions such as ballgames, concerts, bar mitzvahs, church etc, and only in moderation. Beef is forever banned. The effect this meat has on my body and soul is unnerving to say the least. Only 2 days of beer and food was enough to blow me up into a gas filled, pasty assed balloon. The horror, oh the horror.
So it is over. Wine and Chicken our now my top menu items. Long live my colon.

I know where I will be in August

Thompson Memorial Ready
Author Hunter S. Thompson's ashes will be fired by cannon across his American estate, as requested in his will. The bizarre ceremony will take place in August, after a giant cannon has been built and mounted inside a 54-feet tall sculpture of a 'Gonzo fist' - Thompson's trademark and a nod to the 'gonzo' style of journalism he invented - which itself will stand on a 100-feet high pillar. The event will be part of a ceremony to celebrate the life of the Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas writer, who committed suicide at his secure compound near Aspen, Colorado, in February at the age of 67. His wife Anita says, "It's expensive, but worth every penny. I'd like to have several explosions. He loved explosions."

Al Gore is My Pal

Good ole Al. I cant thank him enough for inventing the internet. What a clever guy. So what if he couldn't even carry his own state in the election, which was something like getting herpes from your wife right before she leaves you for the Mexican pool boy. Nothing like having salt rubbed in the wound. But I digress.

Streaming Internet radio has saved my life. Ok, not really but it has sure helped to make the work week more enjoyable. I have lived in three different parts of the USA in the last few years. In Boston, on the gulf coast of Florida and now back in Cow Hampshire. In Boston my radio station of choice was WEEI the great Sports Radio Talk station featuring an eclectic group of fat guys sitting around bitching about the state of sports n New England. In Florida I had Real Radio, another talk station which featured the Monsters of The Midday, a hilarious and edgy talk show that was funny as hell. Though the Monsters rely more on dick and fart joke's they also had some pretty edgy humor, even bordering on racist humor that would never fly up here on the east coast.

So last week I found a great site called http://www.radio-locator.com/ and lo and behold I found both stations are now streaming their shows online. So after picking up a pair of speakers for my work PC I am back in radio heaven. Thanks, Al!

I did a search for the town I am going to in Maine this weekend and it turns out its like 15 minutes from Baxter State Park, the home of Mt. Khatadin, the highest mountain in the park and the end of the famous Appalachian Trail. I have heard much about this famed Mtn. mainly thanks to my cousin Rick's own Appalachian Trail adventure. I wish I would have the time to visit but since my friend is moving there I think later this summer I will get that chance. Unfortunately it is nearly a 6 hour drive. Thank god for my new shiny PSP !! It should help take the edge of the commute.

See ya in Maine! Ayuh.

Breaktime

After all the negative news and general bummers that have been abound lately its nice to just sit back, relax and enjoy spring. The sun is out, winter is all but gone up here in New England. Nothing brightens your day more than a temp above 50 degrees. Baseball Season began on Sunday night as my beloved Red Sox got pounded by the Yankees. Saw "Sin City" on Saturday, what a great flick that was. I am a Frank Miller fan from way back and was blown away at how true to the original Graphic Novels this film was. Great cast, tons of violence and a truly new way to see a comic book come to life onscreen. Highly recommended for some good gritty fun.

This coming weekend is all but gone due to helping a friend out. He is moving 5 hours into Maine and I will be helping him. That takes care of Saturday and Sunday. No biggie though, Jess works all weekend and I could use a change of scenery. I'm hoping the weather will be nice. No beefs today really, just taking in some fresh air, Sox game streaming on the PC, kicking back waiting to go home. If only life could be as carefree all the time.